So called chronicles of my life

I just got back from the movies. Tengok Skrip 7707, arahan si Razak Mohaideen tu. Ok lah… better than his other attemps at ghosts movies like 7 Perhentian and definately better than  Congkak (aku tau lah bukan dia yang direct… i’m just saying….). The movie was not that scary, in fact it was quite funny in certain scenes.

Aku tak puas hati dengan other people that was in the theater actually. Entah apa suweyy aku, setiap kali tengok wayang mesti stuck beside a noisy couple. The ones next to mine did not stop talking loudly almost 90% of the time, it’s like they are the only ones there. Pada aku lah, kalau kau tak suka tengok movie melayu or you think it’s stupid ke hapa, then why the hell waste money to watch and ruined the experience for other people? Shut the fuck up because aku nak tengok bodoh! Bukan kau sorang yang bayar harga tiket tu. Tak suka? Apa lagi, jalan lah – balik! Jangan memekak kat telinga aku, aku nak tengok movie bukan dengar ulasan tak bertauliah dari kau! Ada sekor jantan kat belakang aku pulak, berbual kat handphone dia, keep on saying cerita ni tak sedap, tak sedap…..so fucking rude! Kalau nak berbual pun tak boleh ke lower your volume? Aku rasa maybe sebab tengok cerita melayu, so orang-orang melayu yang tengok ni rasa they have the right to talk thrash or do anything they damn please while it was screening kot? Bersatu teguh bercerai roboh, tak kisah lah kalau perangai memasing tu kurang ajar dan tak beradab. Memang macam ni ke perangai orang kita bila pergi menonton filem melayu di pawagam? I’m so sick of it!

Lagi satu, budak perempuan yang jaga kaunter bawah dekat Cathay City Square tu, really don’t have manners eh? The way she treats customer macam anjing, harap muka jek tebal dengan make-up tapi manners worse dari selipar jamban yang penuh daki. Tolong lah sister, busy macam mana pun, berdepan dengan customer still kena ada adab, ok? No wonder lah counter dia kosong tak de orang line up pun, rupa nya jin tanah yang jaga.  Yang pelik nyer, the staff at the upper level counter was very professional. They greet you, smile, asks you nicely, explain which seating are available, tak de hal pun.

Maybe family budak tu owns Cathay kot…….?

Few days ago I went out for lunch with my mom. I forgot how much I hate going to a lunch crowd filled food court. Especially at the nasi campur stall where there will inevitably one or two or three lady standing undecisively in front a container of lauks. Some will stand there like she had no idea for an eternity, never mind us hungry sods behind her, some will poke the gravy looking for I don’t know – her family heirloom- perhaps, some will stir the gravy, then put down the ladle, then pick up and stir somemore then daintily (not!) pour the gravy into another bowl and in the process drips the gravy all over the counter, and all this happens while I was standing behind them, eyes rolling and one hand on my waist very much like an evil step mother! KENAPA? Why? Do they have to do that everytime… why can’t they just choose one main lauk and two vegetables dishes or just pick any god-damn lauk already?!

After lunch I dragged my mother to the AV0N shop to buy something. The shop was quite full and there was one group of Indian ladies, who I think came across the causeway. They were taking their sweet time looking through the catalogues and choosing things to buy. There were only 5 or 6 of them but the racket they were making is not unlike a pasar borong. One of the lady got a phone call then proceeded to yell for her daughter (?) to come over…aiyoyo kadawale…they were very happening in the store but the most interesting thing happened, when one of the ladies asked the avon saleslady what’s the difference between a “C” cup and a “D” cup bra…….. DUH…??? APAKAH?? Budak-budak sekarang pun tau cup C besar, cup D lagi lah gedabak. I know she wanted to know the size, why not just ask the girl to bring the damn coli cups out and compare, than asking like that? Kelakar siak! Macam tak pernah beli bra jek… adakah kerana baru advance from training bra walaupun sudah berumur lebih 40 tahun? Mak aku yang dah 60 tahun tu pun knows the difference between these bra cups lah, not something that a rocket scientist have to figure out! I even had an exbf who can tell a woman’s bra cup just by ogling her tits, achi ni seorang wanita ok, i mean she has tits like forever, tak kan tak tau…?  Lawak tahap gaban!!!

p/s. i don’t think she’d fill that ‘C’ cup, very ambitious our lady there….

edited to add later during the week :

I just came back from the movies. Transformer 2 – Revenge of the fallen. Serious punye best!!! I love the robots and the fights sequence… did i tell you? L.O.V.E. The storyline is cartoonish but then whatdyaexpect since it is adapted from a cartoon series….(rolls eye..) I love the robots, the human elements of this movie though….membosan kan. Everytime there’s a human scene it makes my eyes start to wander in the dark movie theatre. The lines are not funny, they’re sad pathetic attempt at being funny. Sorry but that’s how i feel. Even Megan Fox is not enough to make me want to watch, the human scenes (btw Megan Fox being compared to AngieJo is like comparing langit dengan bumi ok? anak fox tak bley berlakon lah wey… harap badan je lentik macam mentadak mentadu, she definately can’t act!)…. adakah… tengah syok2 ada battle between the robots and then tetiba ada romantic scene between mekeyla dengan budak sam tu… ick! geli siak… and why lah… megan fox, shia lebouf and perempuan yang berlakon jadi robo bitch dekat dorm tu, they have these orange tint to their skin… apakah?? is it the new trend??

My fantastic escape from reality would have been complete if only i had not sit next to the most annoying couple in the whole wide world. They talked non-stop, they eat non-stop (sitting next to them is like listening to a whole barnyard eating!), did i mentioned? they talk LOUD, they are really like budak-budak sekolah asrama penuh yang hanya dibenarkan keluar 2 minggu sekali and end up so jakun at the world around them. Macam C.I.B**. Aku tau lah kau bayar RM23.00 for your ticket and you are free to do what you want (within boundaries lah setan!) tapi aku pun bayar tiket yang sama harga dengan kau and i don’t want to know about your bloody cousin Rizal in London, who have seen the transformer a week before… BLOODY ANNOYING! At the risk of incurring the wrath of people reading this, nasib lah, i am being a racist here but i am kutuk’ing’ my own race so pergilah cium kentut aku… Kenapa ada Melayu yang aku jumpa kat dalam panggung kebanyakan nya macam tu? The time when aku pergi tengok ‘Jangan Pandang Belakang Congkak’, i was seated next to a family yang ketawa at things that are not funny, benda bodoh ok… bomoh tu cakap auumhhh, oaaummnh… tu pun lawak ke..? I think i was the only one yang tak ketawa, sorry, the only two people yang tak ketawa (fiza pun tengok). Then the perbualan…MY GOD!!!!! kalau aku boleh mute kan suara diaorang i would ok.. sangat membosan kan. Is that how normal folks talk? Am i not normal because i don’t think like that?? Laki aku, anak bongsu and my parents will call me -  berlagak tak sedar diri, sendiri jawa - but ………………………….

ada aku kesah? muahahahahahha…ketawa guling-guling (sorry tak tau coding dia..)